From the Mouths of Babes in April

Eileen:  How do leprechauns carry their pots of gold?  Isn't it heavy? Do they work together with the ants?

Eileen: Ugh!  I can't be expected to remember everything!

Me:  You guys were great at mass except for Robin.  He was a bit on the naughty side.
Eileen:  Yah.  He was on the dark side.

Linus: I'm drawing a picture of myself, my good side and my dark side.

R:  It's too big for me.  (Robin's response to anything he does not want:  an article of clothing, opening a door, pressing the correct elevator button, etc)

Linus has been very focused on earning his big reward this month after not getting it last month.  The month started out poorly so he has had to up his game a little to keep his stars and maybe earn an extra one or two.  The result has been him being over the top nice to everyone--offering hugs, singing to siblings, taking out the garbage, etc.  Yesterday he was busy playing with Robin while I was off doing something else.  I found this on my phone.

It's not the most amazing video, but it's so sweet.  Robin has the exact same laugh at 2 year old Linus.

Haunted by the Ghost of High School

Sometimes something small happens and you find yourself completely unsettled.  This morning I swung through the Starbucks drive-thru to pick up a birthday latte for a friend.  As I pulled to the window, the barista looked very familiar.  I saw the name tag and immediately realized he was an aquaintance/sort of friend/not currently a facebook friend from high school.  Of course I said hi and he didn't recognize me (this happens a lot).  He then literally did a double-take and shook his head in disbelief.  The first thing he said?  "Oh my God, you've lost so much weight!"

Uhh.  I was very gracious and said, "Yes I did."  We briefly chatted about my sisters, who he knew, and then I headed on my merry way with my latte since there was a line behind me.  It's not the first time I've gotten this response.  But it got me thinking, is that what people noticed about me first in high school?  That I was overweight?

As I may have mentioned before, high school was four long years of me learning I was not good enough.  Had the teachers ever gotten together and talked for a moment, maybe one of them would have said, "Gosh we should give that girl a break."  I repeatedly tried to put myself out there, only to be rejected: sports, drama, choir, newspaper editor, art and literature magazine editor... You name it, I put my name in the ring, and never made the cut.  Senior year I think I got a little pity and was cast as a background person in the plays.  Salt was nicely poured into the wounds by having both an older and younger sister who did not meet the same level of failure.  Did I mention all 3 of us were in high school at the same time so I got to see their names on lists, where mine was not.  Seriously.  High school was not good for my self-esteem.

Here I am in all my high school glory. Go ahead and just try to wrap your head around these.

I was insecure and an introvert.  I was a part of a group of friends, but was on the outside.  Like you get to sit with them at lunch, but you don't get invited to the weekend gathering.  I'm grateful to the couple of really good, close friends I had.  Forget about boys.  They had zero, maybe negative interest in me.

Times change.  I'm about 60 pounds lighter than I was when that senior portrait was taken.  This morning's exchange at Starbucks made me realize that high school never leaves you.  If the first thing someone notices about me is that I'm no longer heavy, would everything in high school have been different if I was thin?  If I gain weight, will I become invisible again?

Granted, since high school I became more secure with myself.  I learned how to be more outgoing.  I didn't get to have my Romy and Michelle moment at my 10 year reunion.  I was 8 months pregnant and puking.  Not my best look.  I know it should not matter, but this morning I found myself wanting to scream for all of Bellarmine to hear,

"I'M NOT JOSIE GROSIE ANYMORE!"

I know I'm generally a good person and that the person I was in high school was not "bad."  I wouldn't be there person I am now without those experiences. Still, I can't help but keep wondering if my weight really skewed people's view of me.  It makes me sad.  I can't quite shake the off feeling this morning gave to me.  I don't blame the barista.  He's not the first person to have that reaction.  I'm going to have my moment at the 20 year union and it will be, LEGEN-, wait for it, -DARY.  In the meantime, I'm going to continue to try to be the best version of myself.  And remind myself that it's too bad people's idea of me kept them from getting to know me.

While Mom Was Away

This weekend I attended the Boys Thrive Summit at Shoreline Community College.  I gained so much insight into how boys learn.  It was great.  I look forward to reading more by the main speaker, Dr. Michael Gurian.

While Mama was off learning how to be a better educator and parent while earning clock hours, I left the troops home with Dave.  It does not happen too often that Dave has all three kids by himself all day long.  He did great and thank goodness the weather cooperated.

First he took the kids on a hike through Hamlin Park in Shoreline.

Oh the cuteness.

The kids had a great time and got pretty tuckered out.  They hunted for bugs, hiked on trails, and played hard.

 Apparently, Robin really loved all the posts with arrows.

After the hike, Dave braved a real sit down restaurant with all three.  Eileen had her very first soccer game in the afternoon.  Luckily, the conference ended early enough for me to speed down to Edmonds to catch the game (I missed practice).  Eileen is playing on a team with all her preschool friends.  She has never been super enthusiastic about sports, until this opportunity came along.

When I arrived at the field, I asked Eileen who did her hair.  It looked great.  I was shocked when she replied, "My dad."  I had no idea he knew how to part hair into two even ponytails or braid.  He surprised himself as well.

I'll be honest.  Eileen is not the most athletic person.  She was easily distracted and kept just talking to the other girls on the field.  She did run up and down the field, following the herd, but never quite really "played soccer."  No matter.  She had a great time and loves her pink soccer socks and shin guards.   This is her first time being on a sports team.  Preschool soccer is really more about a mass of children running and tripping and yelling "don't use your hands" from the sidelines.

I'm glad Eileen decided to step outside her comfort zone and play soccer.  I'm even more glad that I could go "adulting" and everything would be just fine.  Good job Dave.  I will happily pass the responsibility of Eileen's hair onto you.  You've proven yourself.

The Force Awakens

Ever since the end of spring break, we have just sort of been plodding along through April.  Today the force awakened in our house, or rather maybe our children did.

I spent the day with my boys.  Neither Linus or Robin felt like going on an adventure (weird).  Instead we baked cookies, chocolate with peanut butter chips.  Robin was ready and impatient.

He is really coming along in his sous chef capabilities, which also makes it harder to do things without his "assistance."  He REALLY like the dough and chased me around the kitchen island with a chair, trying to sneak dough.  I tried in vain to put cookie dough on the sheets while simultaneously moving the dough away from Robin.

After Robin went down for a nap,  Linus and I watch Star Wars: The Force Awakens.  Linus let me snuggle him on the couch for two hours.

I had not seen the movie yet.  I did not expect very much given how terrible the most recent Indiana Jones was.  I have to say, Star Wars was really good.  I loved that the lead was female.  Having now seen the movie, I can't believe Rey, a central character, was left out of the new Monopoly game!  But I digress.

Movie watching inspired Linus to become Kylo Ren.  He assembled the proper attire and constructed a Sith training course.

He really wanted to train Robin.

 But Robin had other ideas involving dandelions.

Training fell to me.  I did my best to learn to use the force.  I can honestly say I enjoyed fighting with the light saber noodles.  I showed Linus no mercy as I chased him around the backyard.

While I was busy baking cookies and trying to put young Kylo Ren in his place, Dave and Eileen had daddy/daughter day.  Dave and I tend to use a divide and conquer approach to the weekends.  This usually means Dave gets paired with Linus.  Eileen and Dave really don't get much alone time together.  Eileen planned her day all week and was bursting with excitement.  Robin was not pleased to be left behind.  We promised him he could have a daddy day soon.

First stop was pedicures.  Dave has never had a pedicure, despite many many many invitations from me.  I told Dave to get the "deluxe."  I don't know if he really appreciated it, but his feet look nice and he has Seahawk colored nails.

After being pampered, it was time for Happy Meals and silliness.

They ended their special day with a trip to the movies to watch, Zootopia.  Eileen saw the movie a few weeks ago and wanted to see it again with her daddy.  Every time Eileen tried to tell Dave about the movie beforehand, she would burst into giggles.

I know Eileen loved getting all of Dave's attention for a few hours.  I'm pretty sure Dave enjoyed an Eileen pace of life.  I had fun with my boys.  Linus and I have been reading the fifth Harry Potter book together and we made a lot of headway today. 

Boys need opportunities to see their Mamas as people, people who are just as capable of tossing a football in the backyard and having a light saber battle as a boy.  They also need time with their Mamas to have quiet snuggle time, share a love of books, and have occasional discussions about the state of the world after hearing the news on NPR.

Girls need their daddies to show them attention, to value them, and listen to them.  Little sisters need the chance to be the one to make decisions and not always get dragged along with what their brothers need/want.  Eileen had the best day (until she crashed from exhaustion).