Mixed Messages from the Universe

I thought I left my teaching career behind when Eileen was born.  I resigned my position and swore I would never teach again.  During my last few years of teaching I was the victim of bullying three times, twice by different staff and once by a group of students.  Despite my many accomplishments in the classroom, I felt beaten down by the system.  Having two young children at home made the decision to leave teaching a little easier.

Last year our lives changed in unexpected ways.  My parents moved close.  While bringing some additional financial cost to our lives, it also added the opportunity for flexible childcare.  These days it's hard to imagine my life without the childcare help I receive from my parents.  Moving out of Seattle also meant switching schools for the kids.  It was a hard choice at the time.  In order to provide more financial support, I needed to work.  Suddenly, that teaching certificate didn't look like such a waste of time and money.

Over the past year I rediscovered a passion for teaching while substitute teaching.  I love going to work with my kids and coming home with them at the end of the day.  I even have additional childcare help from another mom who picks Robin up at school in the morning and brings him back in the afternoon.  I love my kids' school.  The teachers are great.  The community is so inviting.  By making the huge choice to sell our house and move, our lives became so much more fulfilling.

As I immersed myself in substitute teaching, the principal noticed me.  The school is growing, which means there is a need to offer a greater variety of academic options.  It became evident that a teacher was needed to teach a section of geometry/algebra II.  I'm not certified to teach algebra II, but as luck would have it, one of the 6th grade teachers is qualified.  The principal approached me about teaching a section of 6th grade math.  Not only did he offer me a job, he was willing to work around my not wanting to work on Thursdays due to Robin's needs as well as the fact that I will be taking a vacation at the beginning of March.  It was strange to suddenly be in a position where I was valued and wanted.

It didn't take much thought for me to accept the position.  Okay universe I get it.  All the stars are lined up perfectly.  I'm supposed to be back in the classroom.  Or am I......
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Today was my first day.  I think it went well.  It seemed like the kids were buying what I was selling.  And then I went home.  I thought my morning might include a trip to Starbucks or HomeGoods.  How very wrong I was.

I walked in the door.  Robin greeted me and indicated his back hurt.  Then he was very subdued and snuggly.  As I held him, I looked down and saw that there was blood all over me and all over Robin.  He had a bloody nose.  We cleaned him up, but then all he wanted to do was lay on the carpet.  Robin did not move or make noise for about 45 minutes.  He wouldn't respond to my mother or I.  Eventually, he came around a little, but still only wanted to lay on the floor.  It was scary.  I called the doctor.  This level of lethargy without a fever was alarming.  He advised me to take Robin to Children's ER.

Robin and I spent the rest of the day in the ER.  He was a trooper and only complained when he got an IV (standard procedure so they only have to do one poke) in order to get a blood count.

Robin is okay.  His cerebral palsy diagnosis meant that they took extra care with him.  The doctors think the bloody nose is probably just from the sudden warm weather today.  He may also be starting to come down with something.  For now, we are supposed to keep an eye on him and note if there are any more incidences, bleeding, or bruising.

As I sat in the ER with Robin, I could not help but notice that this happened the day I went back to work.  The day!  So apparently while the universe is trying to tell me to go back to teaching, it wants to also remind me that I better not take a full time job because Robin needs his mama.

Thank you universe for all your messages.  Perhaps you could include some footnotes for clarification?