From the Mouths of Babes in January

Eileen: Daddy, will you please put Robin on the ground?  Baby water monster wants to snuggle him.
(Baby water monster is a persona Eileen likes to assume)

Eileen:  I don't want to wear these.  Flip flops are disgusting!

Linus:  Next Christmas I'm going to ask Santa for a guided heat seeking missile.  That will be the best present I'll get.

Eileen:  Why is Cinderella talking to the birds?

Eileen:  Can I do cushion time?
Me: Sure.
Eileen: Cool.

Linus:  Hey Mommy, if you want we could watch tv right now and you could pick the show.  Maybe Phineas and Ferb? 


What cushion time looks like.  The best part is it requires zero help from me.

Three Amigos

A Portland Rose

My niece, Gwendolyn Rose, was born earlier this month.  She gave us the perfect excuse for a weekend trip down to Portland.  Along the way we stopped by the store, Bricks and Minifigs.  It's a LEGO store that carries new and used LEGOs.  Eileen got her first bucket of little LEGOs and a girl scientist minifigure.  Linus got a little bit of everything--Star Wars, Harry Potter, and Atlantis.

I was a little nervous about the trip down.  I didn't want to overwhelm my sister and her family with the addition of 5 people.  It ended up being a great trip.  I cleaned house, shopped (Dave also made a trip to the grocery store), cooked, and helped care for Beth and Gwen (Robin was a very good sleeper during the day).  Meanwhile, Chris and Dave took the big kids to Charlotte's Web at Portland Children's Theater, the Swap n Play, and the zoo.  The kids turned into snakes, played with LEGOs, and made Fruit Loop necklaces.  The boys wrestled and the big kids had a slumber party in Dylan's room.  According to Eileen, they were telling jokes.  All we heard were squeals, giggles, and thumps.

I also used the opportunity to play photo session.  I am not a skilled photographer by any stretch of the imagination, but it is amazing what a good camera, good lighting, and Picasa can do.  I think the pictures turned out great and my sister looks beautiful.

Linus and Gwen

Gwendolyn Rose, not quite two weeks old

mama

I like to call them Christopher Robin and Gwennie the Pooh

I'm skipping!

cousins -- it is IMPOSSIBLE to get everyone to look at the camera

I love this picture

sibling swap

Happy Family

I love that my sister and I have had our kids together.  It has brought us closer and I think it helped us understand and appreciate each other in a different way.  Motherhood is amazing and I am so glad I get to share the journey with her.

January Days

Health has seemingly returned to the house (knock on wood).  No longer rushing out the door to the doctor or hospital, or lying in front of the television with sick kids, a sense of calm and normalcy has settled over the house (knock on wood).  January also signaled a return to preschool.  Hooray hooray!  I can finally relax a little and take a breath.

The kids seem to be enjoying the new calm and getting back into the routine.  I do not know if I have ever appreciated routine as much as I do now.  It helps that Robin has decided to settle into a more predictable sleeping/eating routine and is generally easy to put down to sleep (knock on wood one more time).  The past few days have been especially enjoyable.

The return of routine has meant a return to Linus being required to earn his screen time.  He's been working in his workbook, taking care of his responsibilities, practicing learning to read, and reading books with me. He does not even question this, but just goes about checking stuff off the list.  Eileen has started working in her own workbooks.  As long as I keep them at separate tables, it is all so so nice.  One of my favorites is the requirement that he play with Eileen.

Playing Moses' Ark.  Linus has apparently confused him with Noah. Whoops. Better get on that.

The forced playtime really changes their dynamic and he often keeps playing long after the requirement has been fulfilled.  I've caught them being clams sent in the mail, having dog races, and Eileen riding Linus around the house.  Right now they are really into creating things out of blankets and pillows.  None of it involves me.  It's great.

reading Larf, a new favorite

Linus refuses to go into the basement by himself where his Legos and Playmobil reside.  He is generally content to just play with Eileen's Duplos.

Robin is teething like crazy and is starting to enjoy playing with toys.

Eileen loves to get on the floor and play with Robin.  She frequently "wrestles" with him.

Linus won't let me snap a picture of Robin without jumping into the shot.

Robin is still the cutest baby in existence.

Just look at those eyes and lips!

My friend, Heather, sent the kids a "My Giant Busy Box" for Christmas.  It has been a big hit.  Eileen asks to do a project from it every day.  I love the box because it comes with everything you need and the kids can do the bulk of it with very little assistance from me.

making puppets

Right now I'm just waiting for everything to go crazy once again.  In the meantime I am relishing the quality time I am getting with the kids and the peace that comes from the television being off.  I'm sure since I just said all this that tomorrow everything will go to pot.  At least I will have it documented so I can look back on these times when I am ready to throw in the towel or we are hit by the next plague.  I know our doctor must be missing us.  It's been a whole week.

Daughter

Being a parent is exhilarating and exhausting.  Everyday I am overwhelmed by feelings of love and frustration.  It's not that parenting boys is easy, but I find having a daughter to be terrifying.  While eldest boy requires me to revise, revisit, and get creative with my parenting skills, it is with my daughter that I constantly question myself.

Did I tell her I love her yet today?  Did I empower her?  Did I accidentally compliment her looks/outfit instead of her intelligence or character?  Am I striking the right balance of princess/fairy/pink/purple with non-stereotypical things?  Did I take the time to listen to her and not let her vocal brother overshadow her?  Am I putting my own issues on to her?  Am I being a good role model for her?

I want the best for all my children and boys need their mother, but I cannot help but feel an even stronger responsibility to Eileen.  I want so much for Eileen to find her own version of success.  There is so much pressure on young girls without the addition of social media.  She may only be three years old, but I worry everyday about the road ahead for her.  Having taught middle school, I know what goes on in those halls.  I want Eileen to feel self-assured and not feel the need to be less of who she is for a partner or to fit in with a group.

I worry about her self-esteem.  Eileen has a gap between her front teeth and already the dentist says she will be requiring some orthodontia.  Will an insensitive dental hygenist tell her she would be so much prettier if she just got her teeth fixed?  Yes, that happened to me.  I don't know if I ever fully recovered from that comment.  Will she struggle with her weight?  Can I convince her to love herself as she is?  Did she overhear me when I criticized myself?  Am I inadvertently sending her unhealthy messages?  Can I instill in her a belief in herself so she is not afraid to challenge herself and take chances?  Am I condemning her to a life of comparing her body to others by enrolling her in gymnastics?

I love my daughter with every part of my soul.  I love her gentleness, the way she likes to always hold someone's hand.  I love how she likes to stand next to me on a stool while I work in the kitchen.  I love how she likes to get up close, nose to nose and crinkle her face.  I love her quiet intensity and the joy she takes in everything. I love how she sings when she is in her room by herself.  She is developing a wonderful sense of humor.  I worry every day about the world corrupting her or my somehow failing to protect her.

Yes, everything I have said can be applied to sons, but like I said, I feel an even greater responsibility to my daughter.  I know Linus will be okay.  He is already a force to be reckoned with.  He is stubborn and has a very strong sense of self.   Robin is the poor, neglected third child.  He will just have to learn to fend for himself.   Kidding.

It's my job to show Eileen how to be a woman.  So of course I question what I am showing her by sidelining my career to be a mom. Sure I hope I can impart some domestic skills, including a few I have yet to learn myself, but I want her to feel like she can be an engineer, a doctor, circus clown if she wants.  I am saddened when I think about the fact that there will be times when she hates me and thinks I am ruining her life (Linus tells me some version of this everyday but it is hard to take him seriously).   I look at my aunt, for whom Eileen is named, and see the amazing relationship she has with her daughter and hope that I can share something similar with my own. 

Parenting is hard.  You judge yourself, others judge you.  You can feel disapproving eyes around you.  I'm guilty of it too.  I try every day to be the best parent possible.  Some days I am more successful than others.  Yet I constantly fear I am going to screw up Eileen.  Why can't I parent her with the same relative degree of certainty that I do Linus?  I do not parent Linus perfectly by any stretch, but it is more of a "we will get through this" mentality.

Today someone stopped me in a bookstore to tell me how beautiful she was (she did look insanely cute in a brown dress, white cardigan, and french braids, clutching her lovey).  I hope that Eileen can see what even strangers do, that she is beautiful inside and out.  And then again, I hope she doesn't need the approval of others to love herself. Oy.

Clones

Since his birth, everyone has commented that Robin looks like Linus.  I definitely see the resemblance.  Today's outfit inadvertently took it to a new level.  Once I realized what was happening, I decided to take a picture. 

Robin, 3 months old

Linus, 2.5 months

Uncanny isn't it?  As he has gotten older, I've started to see the similarities between Dave and Linus.  I've always said Eileen looks like a blonde version of me.  It was time to view the photographic evidence.

As of yesterday Eileen decided she would let us put her hair in braids.  I credit the movie, Frozen, for this development.  She looks stinking adorable.

I haven't braided hair for about nine years, not since my niece Nola was two and I used to watch her once a week.  I'm pretty proud of myself.  For comparison, here is me in preschool and first grade.  You will notice that we even smirk the same way.

Kindergarten Dave

Here is a Dave/Linus comparison.

Linus

Even more so, Dave's dad recently gave us evidence of just how Dimock-y our boys are.  Baby Dave may be in an unfortunate outfit and have more hair, but he definitely looks like our Baby Robin.

Notice that even Robin's mouth is the same as Baby Dave.  So really we are just a family of clones, cute clones.

In Sickness and in Health

When you make those marriage vows, you are in the moment and don't always think about what exactly they may entail.  The past few months have been an exercise in the "in sickness" part.  After a pregnancy of bedrest, stress, and extra doctor appointments, we welcomed Robin into the world.  His first morning home, October 4th, Eileen woke up with a cough. Fast forward three months and the sickness has never left.

Eileen had that first cold for about a week, which she then gave to Linus.  From there started three weeks of puking and diarrhea by Linus, followed by other random pukings, followed by another cold by Eileen, who gave it to Linus.  Just as the kids got over colds, Eileen was felled by a fever and vomiting and Linus followed the next day.  This lovely virus is what eventually landed Robin in the hospital for Christmas.  During the fever/vomiting illness, Dave managed to contract strep throat.  Just as Robin recovered, Eileen came down with a nasty cough, who then gave it to Linus which brings us to last week.  Eileen is now over her cough and Linus is almost over his.

On Monday I took Robin to the doctor for another heart follow-up from his trip to the hospital (he was declared recovered).  He had a mild cold that had first appeared Saturday.  The doctor and I noted it and hoped it passed quickly.  On Thursday Robin was a very sad baby (he is normally very very happy).  He coughed all day long.  By late afternoon, his coughing had gotten worse and he seemed to be struggling to breathe.  I googled for some advice and learned that little babies should not get coughs.  I called the doctor's office and very quickly the doctor hopped on the phone asking me how quickly I could get there.  Of course Eileen was not even wearing pants, only a shirt and Batman cape, but I said 20 minutes.  Linus rose to the occasion and got Eileen dressed (pants, socks, and shoes).  I got myself and Robin ready and we flew out the door.  We were taken to see the doctor right away and he then recommended taking Robin to Children's Hospital.  He called ahead so they were ready for us.

Robin did not look good when we got to the hospital, but after having his nose suctioned twice, he improved.  The resident doctor was going to admit us, but then the attending decided against it.  I was relieved.  We were sent home with instructions to regularly suction him using saline drops and a nose frida (these are AMAZING if you don't have one), monitor his breathing rate, and watch for fever and signs of struggling to breath.  Robin got to go back to the doctor again Friday morning (it's a good thing they like us there).  His breathing rate was down considerably from the previous evening.  Robin is doing okay now--still coughing, still congested, still getting lots of suctioning--and it is just a matter of waiting it out.  Oh, and Dave has a cold again. Ahhhhh.

I am very ready for my family to be healthy.  I NEED my family to get healthy. You will notice I did not include myself among all the sickies.  This is because I have avoided illness by sheer will and tremendous amounts of coffee.  I spend a lot of time running on adrenaline at this point. 

Health is my goal for 2014.  I want my family to get our immune systems healthy enough that we stop contracting everything.  I want to find time to do some self-care so I can be a better wife and mom.  I have lost all my pregnancy weight, but still retain the evidence of giving birth to three babies.  I would like to finally develop some core strength.  After spending two thirds of my life overweight, I don't have the healthiest of relationships with food.  I don't want to lose weight (I think I would look sickly at this point if I did), I just want to maintain.  I need to learn how to do this.  I need to figure out a workout plan that doesn't involve joining an expensive gym.  Aside from improving my physical health, I want to work on growing as a person.  I want to find a way to volunteer.  That might not sound like a hard thing to do, but having three small children and nursing can be a surprisingly large impediment to doing anything.  I am hoping that 2014 is the year that I become the best possible version of myself.

3 Months

Robin is three months old today!  He is a sweet little baby and a perfect addition to our family.  He is such a handsome little bald fellow. The kids can't get enough of him.  I love how his head wrinkles make him look like an old man.

Robin is getting big and weighs a whopping 11 pounds 10 ounces.  Don't let those puppy dog jowls deceive you, he is still a pretty tiny guy compared to his siblings as a baby.  Just this week it feels like Robin is making some leaps and bounds in terms of development.  He has discovered his hands, or rather discovered that he has the ability to control them and get them to his mouth.  Like his siblings, he is an early teether.

Robin's favorite thing to do is stare at the wall behind our couch, particularly this one drawing of trees.  Dave and I liked it enough to buy the picture, but Robin seems passionate about it.  The picture makes him smile and if you are holding him upright, he will do everything he can to crane his neck to better catch a glimpse. He enjoys being outside (as long as he isn't cold). Other things guaranteed to make him smile are the very sight of Linus, raising his arms in the air and saying "Woo!" (he's a woo-boy), and playing with his lips.  He still likes to be called "Big Boy" and snuggle cheek to cheek with his mama.

I couldn't pick just one picture of Robin....

"Yes I AM a big boy!! How did you know?"

Robin loves his Linus.

all three of my babies

a bit somber

Looking to Linus for reassurance

Oh, and for the record, three is kids is waaaay harder than two. Just saying.