Festive Saturday Morning

My friend, Beth, asked me if the kids and I wanted to go to the gingerbread houses at the Sheraton today.  I agreed and knew Dave would enjoy having some time off from parental responsibilities.  Beth thought I was crazy for wanting to meet at 9 am, but what I think is more crazy is standing in line for 2 hours (with kids no less) to look at a couple of giant gingerbread houses.

My plan worked great.  There was no line and we even walked through twice.  We continued with our festive morning with some red cups from Starbucks and then walked over to the Teddy Bear Suite at the Fairmount.  I loved what they did this year with the decor.  Usually it is pretty dark in there, but this year it was white and bright.  The kids were all in good spirits.  Linus kept wanting to hold Robin and show him everything.  After snuggling a few teddy bears, we then walked to the Westlake Carousel.  Beth was so sweet and not only did she pay for the carousel, but took the kids to the toy store and bought them each a present.  We ended the trip with lunch at Barnes and Noble.

It was a wonderful morning and the kids were great.  Seattle is so fun during the holidays.  Maybe I can convince Dave to do our Christmas shopping downtown this year.

My favorite thing about today happened when I looked back at the pictures I snapped.  In every photo, Linus is looking away and Eileen is looking at Linus.

On the carousel, Eileen is looking back behind me at Linus.

 I can only hope that one day Linus realizes how much Eileen loves him. 

Whirlwind Thanksgiving Weekend

Wow.  It has been a full 5 days of blessings and craziness.  It is best described in pictures.

Wednesday
Thanksgiving play by the Indians (kindergarten) and the Pilgrims (preschool) followed by pie served by the children.  We then had a wonderful afternoon playdate.  The kids disappeared outside.  Thankful for an amazing school and good friends.

Thursday
We celebrated with the Dimocks.  I made the most amazing stuffing from scratch.  Usually I stick to bringing the pie or rolls and cranberry jelly so this was a big departure for me.  I am so proud of how it turned out.  I think it is going to become my signature dish.  Eileen helped me chopped vegetables while we watched the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade and Dave and Linus played board games.

Gobble Gobble

As we drove home from the feast, Linus said, " I love my family."  I replied, "Me too buddy.  Me too."
 Thankful for good food and marrying into a wonderful family.

Friday
A morning playdate with other friends (a boy for Linus, a girl for Eileen, and a baby for Robin, each just about the same age exactly).  While Eileen and Robin napped, Linus and I started decorating for Christmas.  Eileen and Robin joined in once they awoke.  Linus and I had so much fun, just the two of us, figuring out how to decorate the new house.

While we waited for our new couch to arrive, Linus organized a game of Santa and reindeer.  The reindeer had rope long enough to go around the entire house.

Thankful for the Christmas spirit, creative kids, and new couches.

Saturday
Spent the afternoon in Tacoma, helping my parents pack up and load the moving truck.
Thankful the move is finally happening.

Sunday
Linus, Eileen, and I went to the Pacific Northwest Ballet Nutcracker.  I've always wanted to go and this is the last year for the Sendak set.  Linus decided to be difficult and complained the whole way there.  The kids gave the show mixed reviews.  Linus liked the soldiers, guns, rats, and battles, and the weird Chinese monster.  Eileen sort of liked the whole thing.  Both kid got bored, but fully enjoyed cupcakes and taking pictures in front of statues.  It was also fun running into friends.

All tuckered out, they fell asleep in the car. 

The evening brought more help moving the grandparents, pizza, Christmas movies, and Christmas jammies.

Thankful for the ability to give my kids special experiences and for a husband who is willing to spend his weekend moving my parents.

My parents now live up the road from us and we get to have their piano in our house.  It is the start of a new era for my parents.  I'm not sure how it is all going to work out, but I'm glad things are moving forward.

From the Mouths of Babes in November

Eileen:  What happened to my food baby?

Me:  Eileen. Potty.  Yes or No.
Eileen: Uh.  I suppose not.

Eileen:  My eyes can't see clear.  There are tears in them.

Robin: crawls to food cabinet.  Squawks.  Tenses and shakes body.
Me:  Oh, did you want to eat?

Robin may not say much, but he communicates in other ways.

"ATTACK!"

 "Peek-a-boo!"

Eileen, my little tiny dancer

Eileen's Birthday Weekend

This girl just turned 4!

My sister, Beth, and her family came up from Portland to celebrate with us.  My nephew, Dylan, has a birthday the day after Eileen, and my brother-in-law's is the day after that.  A couple of years ago we decided to do a special birthday weekend every year.  I look forward to it for months.

After a pancake breakfast and lots of playing, Beth, Eileen, Robin, and I headed into Seattle to pick up cupcakes at Trophy.  As per special request, we also went to Nordstrom so Eileen could get a balloon and a new jibbitz for her crocs.  In the afternoon, the boys made presents for Eileen while she napped.  Later Beth and Dave took the big kids swimming at the YMCA while Chris and I stayed behind and napped with the babies.

Back from the pool, festivities were ready to begin.

eyeing the pile of presents

the boys were so excited for her to open their presents

a beautiful custom made piece by Linus

Beth is a crochet-master and made all the kids hats for their birthday.  I think Eileen's hat may be my favorite thing Beth has ever made.

We gave Eileen a giant fairy princess coloring book, Cinderella duplo legos, and two sets of Goldie Blox.  By far her favorite present came from my friend, Heather---a Tinkerbell lamp.

silliness with her balloon from the Nordstrom shoe department

We dined on salad, Annie's shells and white cheddar, garlic bread, and sparkling cider.  Trophy cupcakes turned out to be a wise choice since everyone wanted something different.

post-cupcake Goldie Blox with Uncle Chris

 Robin liked the Gnome hat Beth made him.  He did not like the beard that attaches to it.

Sunday morning we celebrated Dylan with more pancakes and then celebrated all the fall birthdays with a trip to the Curious Circus at Teatro Zinzanni.  It was amazing and so much fun.  Everyone had a good time.  It makes me want to splurge and go to an evening performance some time.

After the show and some lunch, the Rousseaus headed home.   We always have a good time when they visit.  I personally enjoy the chance for adult conversation, board games, and hot wine.

EILEEN AT 4
Eileen is a big bundle of silliness and unbridled energy.  It is not uncommon to see her squealing and running in circles.  She loves books, ballet, Curious George, Bo on the Go, princesses, fairies, rainbows, unicorns, legos, puzzles, french braids, quiet detailed activities like setting up scenes, building things out of cushions and pillows, crafts, and going to coffee and nails.

Eileen dislikes being excluded, timeouts, thinking she has been left behind, being called a baby or little girl or silly or really anything other than Eileen, being teased by Linus, going to bed, shirts that are plain or striped, and polka dots on dresses.

I love that she has imaginary friends.  Gilbert and Barky are spiders.   Gilbert is a boy, Barky is a girl. There is also an imaginary human girl named Kush Kush.  I get the impression that Kush Kush makes a lot of bad choices and is sometimes scary.  

I don't know how she fits in her bed due to all the toys, stuffed animals, and books she keeps with her.  Eileen loves going to school and takes all of her responsibilities very seriously.  Now that she is four, she has declared she can get herself dressed.  She is excited to finally receive an allowance and have some purchasing power.
Eileen can frequently be heard coming up with words that begin with the same letter.  I'm excited to teach her to read.

Oh Eileener-schnitzel, how has it already been four years?

Teaching Empathy

My children are blessed and cursed to have a mother who used to teach middle school.  My fourth year of teaching impacted me more than any other.  I was charged with teaching a cohort of challenging seventh graders.  By the end of the year, I found the majority of them so morally repulsive it was a struggle to stay in the same room with them the final month of school.

I had never encountered such a large group of people who treated one another so poorly and with so little regard, who took pleasure in one another's pain.  It got to a point where I decided to take a break from the math curriculum to instead focus on teaching empathy.  Needless to say, my attempt was not well received.  While some students got it, others missed the point entirely, and two boys actually decided they were going to "teach me a lesson."  The boys were shocked when my reaction to their lesson was tears and taking a few days off from school.  After 9 months with these students, I had a new fear for the future of society.  I made a solemn vow that I would not let my own not-yet-born children be like them.  My own children would know and embrace empathy.

Fast forward about six years and I find myself living with a child who lacks empathy.  It is horrifying to see how badly this child sometimes treats others and relishes pain and sadness they experience.  In a word, yeah my kid is kind of an a--hole. There I said it.  Luckily, said child reserves this less than pleasant attribute for home and is an angel at school.  Unfortunately, his victims extend to not only his parents and siblings, but a few other relatives on my side of the family.

I do not want my own family to dislike my child or loathe being in his presence when he is in one of his moods, nor do I want to feel that way either.  He has too many amazing qualities to be so narrowly defined.  Thus I set about to teach empathy.

Teaching empathy tip #8: Help kids develop a sense of morality that depends on internal self-control, not on rewards or punishments - See more at: http://www.parentingscience.com/teaching-empathy-tips.html#sthash.5VWwx49Q.dpuf

The goal of teaching empathy should be to help kids develop a sense of morality that depends on self-control, not on rewards or punishments.  I want him to choose to be loving and kind because it is the right thing to do, not because I will give him a bribe if he is good or send him to time out if he isn't.

The school our kids go to uses Second Step to teach empathy.  That in combination with the religious education is definitely a help.  I bought the book, How Full is Your Bucket for Kids.  I left it on the shelf and waited for the kids to discover it.  The first time the kids were only quasi-interested.  The second time they pulled the book off the shelf, I employed my teaching skills and asked questions as we read.

After reading the book together as a family before bed, we could see a heightened awareness by both kids.  Empathy-lacking child seemed to be making a concerted effort to "fill people's buckets."  I am hopeful we are on the right track.  The book has given us language we can use with the kids to help remind them how to treat people.

We have guests coming this weekend.  I'm thinking we might brainstorm with the kids some ways they can fill the buckets of their guests.  And then maybe, just maybe, everyone will see my child's amazing qualities and not be distracted by his lack of empathy.
 

Teaching empathy tip #8: Help kids develop a sense of morality that depends on internal self-control, not on rewards or punishments
Kids are capable of being spontaneously helpful and sympathetic. But experimental studies have shown that kids become less likely to help others if they are given material rewards for doing so.

Other research has shown that kids are more likely to develop an internal sense of right and wrong if they are raised with authoritative , inductive discipline--an approach that emphasizes rational explanations and moral consequences, not arbitrary rules and heavy-handed punishments.
For instance, kids are more likely to internalize moral principles when their parents talk to them about how wrong-doing affects other people--inducing empathy and feelings of guilt (Hoffman and Saltzein 1967).
- See more at: http://www.parentingscience.com/teaching-empathy-tips.html#sthash.5VWwx49Q.dpuf

Teaching empathy tip #8: Help kids develop a sense of morality that depends on internal self-control, not on rewards or punishments
Kids are capable of being spontaneously helpful and sympathetic. But experimental studies have shown that kids become less likely to help others if they are given material rewards for doing so.

Other research has shown that kids are more likely to develop an internal sense of right and wrong if they are raised with authoritative , inductive discipline--an approach that emphasizes rational explanations and moral consequences, not arbitrary rules and heavy-handed punishments.
For instance, kids are more likely to internalize moral principles when their parents talk to them about how wrong-doing affects other people--inducing empathy and feelings of guilt (Hoffman and Saltzein 1967).
- See more at: http://www.parentingscience.com/teaching-empathy-tips.html#sthash.5VWwx49Q.dpuf

Teaching empathy tip #8: Help kids develop a sense of morality that depends on internal self-control, not on rewards or punishments - See more at: http://www.parentingscience.com/teaching-empathy-tips.html#sthash.5VWwx49Q.dpuf

School Picture Cuteness

We got our school pictures the other day.  Some moms might not like that their children are making weird faces, but I like that they have character.  Since I'm not looking for the kids to have modeling careers, I love that the faces they are making really capture some of the funny expressions they make on a daily basis.  Linus' smile is normal, but his eyes look a little crazy-making.

Even more, I love that Eileen's expression reminds me so much of my school pictures. 

3rd grade and kindergarten

Speaking of school pictures.  Last week I started subbing.  I spent three days subbing in 7th grade.  Then I got to go back again yesterday to sub 8th grade.  Stepping back into the classroom reminded me of why I liked teaching.   I got so burned out before that I wondered if I had made a bad choice going into education.  I still have no desire to have my own classroom, but goodness it felt awesome to be teaching again and feeling like I was capable and doing a good job.

All dressed up and ready to teach.

Robin is less than thrilled with this new development in our lives. He is starting to tolerate Grandma, but is so relieved when all his people return home to him.  Robin is still very cute and on the move.  He loves how much room he has to explore, but dislikes when he gets foiled.

Halloween

I love Halloween.  The kids love Halloween.  Now that we have 3 birthdays in the month, I've had to rein in some of the celebrating.  That said, we still had a fun month.

Last weekend we went to the school Halloween carnival.  It was fun.  I'm glad we got there early because it was packed by the time we left.

Calvin and Hobbes (formerly known as Linus and Robin)

 Mermaid Eileen looked radiant.

Somewhere along the way, Eileen decided that she would rather be a bat.  Good thing we happen to have two bat costumes on hand.

Given the cold, wet weather she probably made a good choice.

Wearing the obligatory Halloween onesie

The kids and Dave braved the elements and investigated the neighborhood.  It was a good way for to meet the neighbors.

Since we didn't go to a retail location to trick or treat, I think we will be able to skip the candy buy back at the dentist.  They might not have pounds of candy this year, but there is enough that they might not miss all the chocolate that I plan to hoard away for myself....

We finished the evening with baths and board games.  Eileen went to bed like this

Sweet dreams....if you ever wake up that is.  Mwha ha ha.

Happy Halloween.